Monday, August 30, 2004

Aquariums make me super horny

*rubs my coconut nipples* ...

Ok, I've seen 50 First Dates an insane amount of times. But the strange thing is each time I see it, I love it just as much as the time before.

There is a scene where Lucy *says it like Ricky Ricardo* asks Henry those words "Do you love me?" and Henry responds "I go to this restaurant every morning, and I see you there reading" (pause) "I love you very much. Probably more then anybody could love another person"...

In this short period of time in the movie my heart just sinks to the bottom of my feet and I even have a hard time breathing. Why is this so emotional to me? I think to some degree when Henry starts thinking about seeing Lucy every morning he stops and realizes that he doesn't see himself not seeing her every morning. Is this really love in of itself? Do you dream about your partner and see yourself with them in things and places that haven't even happened yet? Do you remember and get those butterflies in your heart when you think about those times when you two did something special together? Maybe hear a song in the car and you both started singing to it... maybe a time when you saw something that touched your soul and your partner grabbed your hand and squeezed it just a little harder because they felt the same way?

In these moments of our lives we take just a few seconds and bring happiness and tears for the rest of our time.

Some of these moments I'm already experiencing with the current person I'm with. Just like with past relationships there are times in each that I'll take to my grave and hope to see in that movie that plays your mind before you die.

What moments do you want to see in your movie?

These are a few I'll pray to see in mine:

1) When I moved out of my mom's house to move in with my ex BF Kevin. I remember my mom with tears rolling down her eyes and squeezing me so tight, I felt like I stopped breathing. Her simple words to me while crying were "My baby is leaving me! Please go and remember I love you always."

2) My sister right before her operation giving me a huge smile of being glad to see me before she goes in, grabbing my hands and seeing a few tears in her eyes I tell her "Everything is going to be ok, I love you!" and Sis, I mean that... no matter what even today... everything is going to be ok.

3) Kevin grabbing my hand at Tracks and at the stroke of midnight he got down on his knees and asked me to marry him. I said yes, and the huge crowd around us all cheered. We may not be together today, but this still brings back a sense of happiness I well never forget.

4) Nick (another ex BF) grabbing my hand as we are driving in the snow and he is having a hard time controlling his car says to me "If I die today, I would be happy knowing I died with you"

5) Dre pinching, kicking (playfully), and then winking at me letting me know he had the hots for me without even saying a word. Also his gifts to surprise me was one thing I'm sure I'll hold on to.

6) Chuck - wow - you all know Chuck is my newest BF I'm seeing right now? Well, since he is new I'm sure we have plenty of powerful times ahead. Already, watching 50 First Dates with him, and each time a mushy part came onto the screen, he squeezed me letting me know that is the way he is feeling for me. The boy seems to be some kind of miracle. Being in his car showing me all around town (Baltimore is full of porn) and Tracy Chapman's Fast Car comes on... and we both start singing.... already things that are engraved in this head, even if for some reason things don't work out. Although I really hope they do because there is something really strong there. I have no doubt in my mind that we could easily be something that lasts a long time :)

Did you notice that they all seem to have a physical action (hugging, grabbing, touching).. I believe this can be a reason I'll remember them so much. Not only what happened in each event was meant by the heart, but it included something that I believe some take for granted, the ability to touch another person. I think if you are in a situation where the heart comes into play, don't be afraid to let your body express that as well.

These are the moments that I hope I take to where ever I go and shall play in my mind whenever I need to feel good. If I can keep these - then that's as good as heaven in my book.

[Listening to:
Fast Car - Tracy Chapman]

There is a Seinfeld for that too?

There seems to be a Seinfeld episode for just about anything. And the sad thing is I keep on missing them!

Sure, I get the
Soup Nazi and Elaine's dancing shows all the time. And of course who can forget the bad B.O. in the car that they just can't get rid of? But where are all these other episodes that people talk about and why do I miss them?

I've heard several people say "Oh you should have seen the Seinfeld episode where.... " . I've turned on Seinfeld so many times in reruns (never did appreciate it while it was still actually on the air before syndication). You would think by now I would have seen all the episodes, maybe even twice. But with my bad luck with them, I always get the same ones.

Where are these missing episodes!? I'm about to write Fox and tell them I've had enough Soup Nazi for a year... give us something that hasn't been played in a while.

For any of you big fans of Seinfeld out there,
you might want to look at this. Hell, I'm even tempted to print these out and read them in my spare time (if I had some).

Sunday, August 29, 2004

A test that is floating around

I've seen this test on several blogs now. Since everyone else is doing it... here are my results. I do have to say for the most part, it's kinda accurate.

eXpressive: 6/10
Practical: 3/10
Physical: 3/10
Giver: 4/10
You are a XSIT--Expressive Sentimental Intellectual Taker. This makes you a Hellcat.

Yowza, you are fiery to be with. You're dynamic and volatile and a living roller coaster. You're also very attractive and immaculately groomed, so your target sex gets drawn in like a moth. You love the attention and never get tired of it. At a party you command attention, but you're a lightweight with alcohol and if you drink too much there can be trouble.

Like an XSYT, you tend to over-analyze things, so the slightest comment or action from your significant other can send you into a tailspin. Conflict with you can be either very productive or very dangerous. You are incapable of lying -- you have no guile -- and if your partner can't handle the truth, that's his/her problem, not yours. You are explosive when you're upset, but when the smoke clears you are right back on track with no ill will.

This is a highly effective way to resolve issues and keep them from brewing, but this can stun and hurt a partner with a more laid-back approach. You aren't angry later, but s/he might be. Make sure when you've gotten your satisfaction that your partner is satisfied as well!

You would never cheat. But combine your hot-blooded style with the fact that your partner is *attracted* to that style, and you've got a recipe for being cheated on. If you pair up with an X_YG (and that's not unlikely) you may get caught in his/her cycle of cheating. Make sure your partner feels appreciated and loved to balance out the fire of your approach to conflict.

If you're female, you're kind of like Evita or Teresa Heinz Kerry. I can't think of any famous men like this.

Of the 25004 people who have taken this quiz, 5.7 % are this type.

DC Blogger Meeting

For those that are interested ;) here are some shots from the meeting:

I'm in the bottom pic of this pic (I was all sweaty and nasty, and I tell you, not photogenic at all....) Thank you!

On this note, I think I would have been more social with some AC and a drink or 2 (we were outside and it wasn't as comfortable as it could have been) WAH WAH! I know, complain complain... It was still a really nice group of guys though.

Here are some more pictures. Although the pictures at this site are huge and for some reason doesn't resize on my screen correctly for me, so I have reposted the pic of me below that was on this sight in a smaller form. Thank you for these pics BTW!

Thanks to Chrisafer for organizing the event, and Boifromtroy for making a guest appearance.

Christian (and Vince) from Outlet Radio provide a great list of links to some of the bloggers that were there. Joe, Christian, Michael, Paul, & Ryan who sat around me were all nice guys and definately sweet hearts to put up with me ;) The rest of you were to far away to really get any feelings on how you were. I'm sure there were some psychos in the crowd ;)

And yes I did take my glasses off :-P Thanks to Jay for the pic! Posted by Hello

[Listening to: My Immortal - Evanescence ]

Saturday, August 28, 2004

DC Blogger get together

Just wanted to give a shout out to all those gay DC bloggers I met earlier today. You all seemed like nice guys and can't wait to start reading some of these new blogs I learned about there.

It was a cool get together. Unfortunately I never do well with crowds. I'm sure I looked like mister "Anti-social" but I'm just shy like that when I'm around groups of people I don't know. I also get extremely nervous.

I tend to do a lot better when I'm around just a few people.

I'm sure my picture might get posted somewhere, somehow about this. And my guess would be that I probably look terrible in it. I'm the type of person (this may sound weird) where I tend to be caught making the stupidest faces in pictures unless I know exactly when the picture gets taken.

But in any case, I enjoyed meeting all of you guys and thanks for inviting me.

What toys do you have?

Friday, August 27, 2004

Party all the time

My office celebrates everything, and it's getting expensive! A coworker bought a new house so we had a party when she got the good news. Now there is an e-mail going around to "bring a gift as we celebrate 'Meows' house warming party". I'm tempted to say "No thanks" because the e-mail needs a responce to know if we'll attend or not. Mind you this is being done during office hours and just a few cubes down from mine. I feel like I have to say "Yes". I mean, if I say no it'll look awful, wouldn't it? They'll all be celebrating just a few feet away from me and I'll look like the fucking Grinch...

But this is getting rediculous, I mean we just celebrated a coworker's daughter getting married. None of us have even met this girl before. And a couple weeks back we celebrated another coworker's 5 year wedding anniversary. And yet again, no one has met the husband here.

I think birthdays are nice and acceptable, but we gotta draw the limit somewhere. And that's why I feel like I should say "No". I mean, when my cat takes a good dump in her litter box should I tell my coworkers about that?

I want some cake damnit! Princess Gaby took a good shit this morning!

[Listening to: More to Life - Stacie Orrico]

Thursday, August 26, 2004

Shat! A quick story.

Unlike Wayne who was able to make it in time... (this is the second time I link to that hysterical post)... I admitted I didn't make it....

x25: lol..u shat yourself?

Auto response from CuteYoBoy: lunch time yo!

CuteYoBoy: yeah I did, stop hate'n ;)
x25: lol
x25: HOW
CuteYoBoy: I don't know, I guess I ate something bad or some shit... but I stood up on my way into work one morning in the parking lot and felt this like "shit, I really have to shit, and NOW feeling"
CuteYoBoy: well I took off running, but the bathrooms are all behind our security doors on each floor, and since they only give us access to the floor we work on.. and I was on the 5th floor...
CuteYoBoy: the elevator ride.. the LONG parking lots and hall ways...
CuteYoBoy: I just didn't make it in time
x25: awwwwwwwwww
x25: poor guy
CuteYoBoy: lol
CuteYoBoy: you think it's funny as shit
CuteYoBoy: and so do I now
CuteYoBoy: then I just wanted to hide and couldn't wait to get out of the bathroom (trying to clean up)... called my boss on my cell and said I had to go home and tied my jacket around me and took off.

Yes, that is how it happened folks.. so no more wondering out there ;)

[Listening to: Unpretty - TLC )]

Wednesday, August 25, 2004

the sea monkeys have my money... yes, I'm a natural blue...

So some of you may be asking, "why was Billy so happy the other night?" Well, just to put your mind at ease so you don't have to be waiting for the gossip any more...

Just like those damn sea monkeys who Dory dreams about in Finding Nemo that have her money .. I've been dreaming about a boy that I met not that long ago that has my heart.

I haven't been writing about the details on this guy because I didn't want to jinx things. I've heard about bloggers writing about their relationships and suddenly it goes to shit. Plus everything is really new here. We just officially became BF's last night (after a few dates together with me dreaming of the chance to be with him). Yeah that's sad right? I mean, I told you all that I move fast.

Well, I won't give many details about him yet. I'm also not sure what all you might want to know about him anyways. I will say that he seems like a sweet heart. I hope he doesn't turn out to be some kind of psycho. But it's still to early to tell all of that really.

We did meet in an interesting way. I'm on (as if you want to add me) and back in March he wrote me a note on there through a mutual friend's contact link. Back in March I was dating Dre. When I got the note from him which said, "Woof! Billy WOOF!" I thought "how cute is that, and how cute is he". But didn't reply back and let it be since I was happy with the person I was with.

After Dre and I broke up about a month and a half passed and I logged into friendster and saw that note sitting in there. I decided "hell, no harm in responding now". And wrote him back. We started chatting on AIM and e-mails and hit it off. Things eventually led to us meeting in person at his job (a very busy public place) and when I saw him my heart went THUMP THUMP!

I spent time that evening with him at his workplace and then drove home. Yes kiddies, no sex just yet (even now a few weeks later and several times seeing each other in person). We both seem to be holding out for that special moment, but have you ever gotten that feeling that you think it's gonna be good... well I get that feeling ;)

And I'm sure some of you just want to GAG right now!

[Listening to: Love U More - Sunscreem]

Tuesday, August 24, 2004

What a wonderful world!

Well I had a great night. I need to get to bed but I just feel like singing :) I don't think anything could bring me down from this high.

I'm trying out this new blogging tool w.blogger that was recommended by Shannon (you're awesome!!) Thank you! It helps in solving those problems of uploading your posts to blogger when you are scared you might lose entries if the site is acting shitty. It also has this sweet "what I'm listening to now" plugin for winamp and WMP9 and searches for a mp3 song so you can hear it too.

Here is a crazy picture for all you cat lovers and haters

Cat Carrier

69 Things I probably shouldn't admit

This post is probably the toughest I have done. It's hard to tell people your faults. Just don't think of me to bad when you see these. I was trying for a hundred, but then it started to get harder and I thought 69 was a good number! ;)

1 - I have chewed on my nails
2 - I could put mayo on anything
3 - I am overly sensitive to certain things
4 - I have a temper
5 - I'm a jealous person when it comes to my partner
6 - I hardly ever drink water (only soda)
7 - I would do just about anything for a good donut
8 - I get lost easily
9 - I hate city traffic and try to find excuses to get out of driving in it
10 - I sometimes wonder if Jessica Simpson and I have the same IQ (on those blond moments)
11 - I sing in my car only when it gets dark so people don't see me singing
12 - I have pee'd in the shower
13 - I have taken ephideran to stay awake
14 - I can't dance so I hate going out to clubs
15 - I hate people who rely on drugs to make them happy
16 - I think certain things about Mormans I'll never understand
17 - I feel like I rely to much on having someone to cuddle with
18 - I'm in debt
19 - I'm addicted to video games and surfing the web
20 - I love reality TV shows
21 - I'm a huge fan of Star Trek Voyager
22 - I listen to Celine Dion
23 - One of my favorite movies is How to lose a guy in 10 days
24 - I have gay and straight porn
25 - I don't iron my clothes very often
26 - I sometimes walk out of the house without matching
27 - I studder when I'm nervous
28 - I play my music way to loud in my car (enough to make the cars around me shake)
29 - I'm a fan of sports, but don't keep up with the scores and placements that often
30 - I get turned off by people that are to queeny
31 - I have stuffed animals on my bed
32 - I know almost all the words to the Phantom of the Opera
33 - I shave my privates
34 - I'm really scared about death and what happens after we die
35 - I have laughed at a funeral
36 - I have laughed in a church service when everyone was quiet (someone told me a joke that popped in my head)
37 - I have called in sick when I really wasn't
38 - I have skipped school
39 - I have done some drugs a LONG time ago
40 - I social smoke
41 - I stay pissed at the little things for a long time sometimes
42 - I have watched Falcon's Crest with my mom growing up
43 - I get a hard on whenever I see a cute guy on a sport bike
44 - I have had a 3some
45 - I can sit on my ass all day in front of a TV
46 - I eat way to many sweets
47 - I spend money when I'm depressed
48 - I help other people with fixing their computers, but then do a half ass job on it so they won't keep bugging me
49 - I'm a sucker for a romantic cheesy movie - such as Sleepless in Seattle
50 - I don't like taking money or people helping me out (it's a pride issue)
51 - I wake up at the last minute for work, and fly down the road at 90 to try to get there 15 minutes late.
52 - I tell people I'm busy with work when sometimes I just don't feel like talking with them
53 - I went through a really bad slut phase MANY years ago
54 - I take forever to cum
55 - I look like I'm busy with work when my coworkers want to talk
56 - I hate talking on the phone
57 - I can eat a whole pizza
58 - I love roller coasters (except wood ones, ones you stand up on, and suspended ones)
59 - I have shit myself running to the toilet at work
60 - I grind my teeth in my sleep when I'm stressed out
61 - I wouldn't give certain family members any money if I won the lottery
62 - I have lied to get out of a ticket
63 - I have shaken a vending machine to get a free snack
64 - I have drowned an ant hill with water
65 - I ate a mud hamburger
66 - I have scared teenagers in my way by getting close to running them over (you should have seen the look on their face)
67 - I throw out food before it expires (if I even think it could be getting bad it's gone)

68 - I pull the skin off my chapped lips
69 - I can hear most people whisper their secrets but pretend I don't hear a thing (I have really good hearing)

Monday, August 23, 2004

Have you ever wondered..

Have you ever wondered what a song's name was in a commercial?

You can try finding the answer at these 2 sites.

Sorry for the short post but I'm pretty busy today. I'll post more tomorrow!

Names, Names, Names!

Here is another post of music selections from my collection. Again, you'll find just about anything in these lists.

For the past lists click HERE - HERE - HERE - HERE

Click on the link to hear a sample of the song (in WMA9 format)

1) When in Rome - The Promise (Tony Moran Mix)
2) Tillmann Uhrmacher - On the Run (Ocean to Shore Club Mix)
3) Lebo M - The Lion Sleeps Tonight
4) Toy Box - Best Friend
5) Urban Cookie Collective - The Key, The Secret (got the enya mix)
6) Alice Deejay - Will I ever Fall in Love
7) Good Charlotte - Say Anything
8) Paula Abdul - Promise of a New Day (techno mix)
9) Kim Carnes - Bette Davis Eyes (OPM POPPY Club Mix)
10) Boy Krazy - That's What Love Can Do
11) Mike Oldfield - To Be Free (Pumpin' Dolls to the Top Club Mix)
12) Absolutely Fabulous - Pet Shop Boys (Radio mix)


*EDITED 8/23/04 (one of the links didn't work)

Friday, August 20, 2004

2 pictures from my short vacation

My sister and I at the beach Posted by Hello

Mom and I Posted by Hello

..and a little more..


To continue on the post I did a little while ago on my
first gay experience, here is some more to that story and how I came out.

Well, after that night with the Navy Seal guy I had lots of happy penis thoughts running through my head. I kept on thinking how good it felt having that cock in my hands, mouth, and ass. And now I was craving it big time.

Luckily I guess I wasn't that bad because Navy Seal did ask me out several times again. If fact, even though he had a wife, he had asked me to come with him to NC where he was going to be stationed in a few months. He was also going to dump his wife. Now before this turns into a Santa Barbara type soap opera I tell him that was really nice of him to offer but I couldn't just pick up and leave. NOW NOW... I know all you people out there are probably thinking "Are you crazy?!, Why not give it a chance?!" Well, I'll tell you why... I wasn't in love with him and he wasn't in love with me. While I had some feelings for him I basically put up a barrier to not become to attached because I knew he had a wife and was leaving to NC soon. He also made it very clear that he "liked" me but wasn't in love with me. It was also stated that I was more of a "fuck buddy" that he wanted to keep around.

Now I'm flattered in a way because he was one hot mother fucker, but I also felt used and abused and decide things are gonna have to end between him and I.

After we split up I become curious to find out what all is out there so I decide to make a trip into the city to a gay book store. HOLY MOTHER OF PORN COCKMAN!!! They have magazines, videos, toys, & horny guys!! What a wet dream it is! I remember looking at the magazines in the back of the store and getting rock hard. I tried to rub it some by putting a hand in my baggy jeans pocket and from that it stood at full attention for everyone around to see. I had several guys eyeing both the magazines they had in their hands and me at the same time. It was kind of a turn on at the time.

I decide I'm in heaven and buy a few hundred dollars worth of porn. After all, when am I gonna get into the city again and how long is it gonna take me to find someone else to be with?

So home I went with tons of magazines and videos in tow. The magazines get stashed in between the mattress and box spring and the videos just get there labels pulled off and put in my VHS movie collection.

Now a few weeks go by and I get my first BF Klyph (another story for another day). Klyph lasts for about a month and a half. Then I go through a slut phase for about another month or so. Then I have my next BF Nick (again, another story I have to write about). Nick and I lasted for about 6 months. Then my next BF was Alex which lasted about 3 months. This is where things get into my out story.

Alex is a long distance relationship (my first). So to make things easier on Alex I would ask him to stay the night over at my mom's and step dad's place. I still lived with them as I was going to college at this time. I remember my mom not really saying or thinking much about him spending the night and him sleeping in my room. I had thought maybe she was thinking Alex was just a good buddy and he would sleep on the floor of my room. At least that was the picture I thought my mom had painted.

But a few weeks go by and I'm away at Alex's or he is over with me and things start to get questioned. I remember my mom asking if Alex wanted to sleep on the sofa downstairs because it would probably be more comfortable for him. I told her "Nah, I'm sure he is just fine where he is at" ;)

Alex is again, another story for another time. While you have a little background on him he has his interesting moments just like all of my other ex's. Now while I'm about to get into what pulled me out of the closet, I know now that my mom had suspicions before him and it actually started with Nick. There was a huge snow storm in the DC area the time I was with Nick and I got stuck at his place. My mom drove my step dad's huge truck out to give my Camero a tow (this was several days later after the storm and they started to clear the roads. This was a storm everyone was talking about for many years). Well when she was out to save my ass from being stranded at Nick's, she told me she thought something was a little off there.

Anyways - since I was at college and worked full time I hardly had anytime to clean my room. My room was emanating FUNK from its pores. So one day while I was out my mom decides to clean my room, and you guessed it - she finds the porn!

When I got home that night I saw my mom sitting down at the kitchen table and as I walked by her she said those dreadful words "We need to talk". I had no clue what was coming since I didn't even know she had cleaned my room or anything.

I get this look on my face of surprise and grab a seat. Immediately with only a slight pause to take a deep breath she says "Honey, I love you no matter what. I need to ask you something and I want you to be honest with me, are you gay?"

I remember in that split second after she asked me I thought "how am I gonna get out of this one!?". Well before I could say anything about how I wasn't (yes I was gonna lie to not hurt her) she added "I found some magazines in your room". I knew at that point, it was over and I had to come out.

So with tears forming in my eyes and thinking how this next word would change the rest of my life and what a disappointment I must be to her I said it.. "Yes".

She started crying a little and said "I need time to think and I'm upset, but remember I always love you. Please let me be".

And I left for my room. Immediately once I got inside my room and closed the door behind me, while I was sad.. a smile came to my face thinking that I no longer had to hide who I was.

After a few minutes of feeling a weight being lifted it suddenly hit me, what about the rest of my family!? How would they react?

Now that mom knew though, Alex was at the time not allowed to sleep in my room when he came over. Sure this may sound harsh, but mom was still very new to it all, and it's not like she would be happy and fine with it the next day. She actually went to therapy because of it. She immediately blamed herself for me being gay because for awhile I didn't have a father figure. There was a time when my parents got a divorce that I spent almost all my free time with my mom trying to help her move on and forget about my dad. This is when mom and I became really close. Us two (along with a foreign exchange student Vanja from school) would take off on trips to different places, including my favorite place in the world (so far) Disney World. So all of this hanging around my mom made her think that she could have turned me gay. Luckily through therapy and me reinforcing that it wasn't her fault at all, she now knows she wasn't a part of that and probably wouldn't even care anymore.

Just to let you know now my mom is extremely cool with it at this point. She loves whomever I love and insists on them calling her "MOM" as well. She's even tried looking for a BF for me now.

I'll get into the rest of my family another time since again, this post is getting long. And I know some of you all don't like long posts. But this begins and is the major part of my "out" story.

My Band!

Yes, I'm the guy you want to kill because I'm in the cube next to you singing "Ordinary Day" by Vanessa Carlton.

Speaking of "My Band", why couldn't that famous picture thingy tell me I looked like Eminem? ;) I actually have a picture that kinda makes me look like I was being a poser and trying to be him.

I have so many blogs I want to write, and not enough time. But I figured I would write down my blog goals within the next few days...

  1. I want to write up a 100 things I'm a little bit ashamed about to admit to (like the tweed going on in and a twist on the 100 things about me (which I still need to do too)
  2. I want to write my "out" story so that I can satisfy Hot Toddy
  3. I want to put up the pictures of my mom and sis from my vacation I just took
  4. I want to create another music post and force you all to listen to some more crap
  5. And do all of this while eating ice cream naked ;)

Thursday, August 19, 2004


Someone asked about my tongue (I forgot the ruler, sorry!) . It's not sticking all the way out, but gives you an idea. I can sometimes touch the tip of my nose with it if I try hard enough. And what a shitty picture this is! Just look at the tongue and nothing else!

This thing is a bunch of BS!

Ok, so I submitted a photo to this site because I saw a link from one of the blogs I read.

It's supposed to tell you which stars you look like. Here were my 3 results...


1) Ryan Philippe

2)Ricky Martin ---------- 3)George Clooney

Bling Bling

A couple of my friends rushed to send me this link around the same time, I'm guessing because they know how much I pimp out my shit or they wanted to give me a good laugh. Well it worked on the laugh and yet I do find it a little intriguing *thinking* How would my mountain bike look with those babies!?

If Jamie Foxx says they are cool, I gotta have them! ;)

POST # 69!

Anchor : "How bout you show us some ass?"

Phelps : Only if you promise to lick it later.

Phelps : Five dollars gets you the full monty

*Phelps thinking* Wait, I can't show it till this rash disappears.

Wednesday, August 18, 2004

Update on those fetishes

In response to the comments on this post, I figured I would reply with another.

First off, before I get down to the juice I wanted to agree with
Jef on a comment he made on this blog. He said that trust and humor are a part of the foundation for a relationship. I have to agree and I'm shocked I missed mentioning those in my writing. Trust is a HUGE thing. Once you lose that it becomes very hard to stay in one and work things out. If you trust the person you are with it definitely seems to make it all just fit together because you don't have to worry about things... and know you can count on one another for anything. I've lost trust in past relationships and I knew then it would be the turning point. You don't know how many times though I tried to work things out after that (I just hate to end things without giving it my all), but it just never seemed to be.

And humor definitely comes into play too. I gotta have someone who will laugh when I can't say the word "single" vs "signal" correctly. And they also either think I'm a total dork for my sense of humor, or laugh right along and play with my silliness sometimes ;) And they gotta make me laugh as well.

You know even though I gave that list of things I'd like to see in a guy none of them are required. I know I'm not going to find someone with it all. Just some of those things would be nice.

Ok, now for the strange fetishes that all of you seemed to comment about wanting to know more.

I'm definitely an unusual person when it comes to fetishes. Both with whomever I'm seeing, and my own. I had a boyfriend that was into some very kinky shit. Because I loved him and would do just about anything to make the person I'm with happy I had no problems doing them. I'm definitely more a giver then a taker. I want to see the person I'm with happy. Now that I'm painting a picture of my sainthood I shall dirty it up a little with the things I could get into. Mind you, I haven't had but 1 experience where it came close to my fetishes. My ex's would never seem to get into them, but then again I'd never make them or need them too. You know, it's nice to have but never required sorta deal. And I'll say that to whomever is in my future. They'll know these things kinda turn me on as well, but never need to feel required to do any of it in order for me to be happy.

One of the biggest and oddest fetishes I have deals with clothing. I'm a huge uniform/clothes kinda guy. If a guy is in a uniform, YUM! Or if he wears certain clothes, I'm almost instantly attracted to him. These clothes would consist of things like baseball caps, jeans (baggy jeans even better), leather jackets, T-shirts, wifebeaters, visors, Timberland boots, sweats, sports apparel. Any of these would help, and if he's wearing Tim's, jeans, white T-shirt, and a black leather jacket.. LOOK OUT! ;)
I'm into leather to some degree, but not into the S&M extreme. I just think guys in leather jackets can give me that extra OOMPH!
During the 1 experience I had (which didn't last very long because we got naked pretty quickly) the guy had on jeans with a wifebeater and a black leather jacket on top. He unzipped and I went all for it and boy was I happy.

I seem to have a fetish with guys on sport bikes. Something about a guy on a sport bike. That machine between his legs as he straddles all that power between his crotch... yum!

Not really a fetish and more a side thought of something I would like to do - have sex on a beach at night on a blanket (so the sand doesn't get into places it shouldn't).

A dirtier fetish of mine is that I'm very oral. I have a long tongue and don't mind using it. I'll lick about anything in sight. Also kissing is one of my favorite things to do.

Ok, maybe I should stop my list here before my blog is only know for being the smut of the internet ;)

Olympic Pride ;)

Need help rubbing those muscles? Posted by Hello

Yummy Posted by Hello

Lisa lives on!

And hopefully her blog will for a very long time. I got the biggest laugh from this post.

If you have the extra time, you should definately read it.

I might wanna marry you one day...

if you watch that weight and you keep that firm body... (Hands Clean - Alanis Morissette)

NO! I'm not that shallow.

Sure, looks are definately something with an initial attraction to someone. But they also change in time. Some people seem to get prettier as they get older, and some just the opposite. Beauty really does come from within.

What do I really want? As simple as it may sound and much harder to get - Someone that can love me as much as I love them.
Of course there does have to be things about them I love. If a guy is a great cuddler, thats a HUGE plus. If he can talk, another plus ;) Someone that has some similiar interests with me (like maybe video games, driving around,music, acting silly sometimes) + + + +. I want someone who while looks like a man and acts like one sometimes, can also be comfortable enough with themselves to express emotions if they have to. A guy who isn't afriad to sing now and then. Someone who can be both serious and yet at times have the kid in them come out.

Fresh breath helps too.

I also want somebody that is serious enough to give the relationship a chance. Not go running away when something goes wrong.

You know what? This list could go on and on - I haven't even touched my fetishes yet and how someone with them would be a big benefit.

But what it all comes down to is that I hope one day I'll find someone that is honest, caring, loving, romantic... with a big heart, and maybe just some of the physical qualities I find attractive to get things going between us.

And then we'll live in a nice house, have 2 kids, play xbox, and toss a ball with them in our back yard.

Is that to much to ask for? ;)

Monday, August 16, 2004

Group Therapy

Now to fill you in a little bit on my vacation. Now that I type it, it doesn't seem as entertaining as I thought!

I left to my mom's place on Thursday night so that we could get up first thing Friday morning and get to the beach. My mom had invited my sister and I with her for some quality time. We haven't really spent much time as a family together recently. And all of us were missing it I believe. And don't say it, it was not a "girls time out"! If you were thinking that, BOOOO on you!

Anyways Friday we left and once we reached Ocean City we went almost straight to the beach. The sun was out and so we wanted to take advantage of it since we heard a storm was on the way. Well, after a few minutes I was out like a light. My mouth was open and drool was coming out ZZZZZZZZZ! ;) All I remember next was the natural instinct to grab the towel and wrap it around me because I was getting cold. Then I thought, wait... getting cold isn't a good thing when you are outside. My sister and mom actually had the same reaction about the same time I did. And we all noticed the sky was gray and the winds were picking up.

We decide to go get ready to go out and eat.

At dinner (we went to some fancy restaurant) we had a cute waiter. My mom and sister were all about him. Even I was impressed with his looks. A little to old for me, but his smile was pretty and he patted me on the back a few times when he would walk by our table. My mom and sister didn't get that! But what was funny was that he caught my sister oogling at him and came up to our table and asked her if anything was wrong. "I noticed you were looking at me, is everything ok?", My sister was almost speechless because it was true she was looking at him.. but with eyes of desire.

After dinner we hit the boardwalk and walked and shopped. My mom is an amazing person. I LOVE YOU MOM! She insisted on buying all our clothes and things that we bumped into and liked that night. I felt bad for her paying because I take great pride in working for what I own. But since she kept on insisting to do it, I did cave in and let her.

Sat. it rained the whole day. So we all decided this was the best day to hit the hundreds of outlets in the area. We went to Rehobath beach where I pointed out to my mom and sis that this was a predominantly gay beach. And they just remarked how clean and cute everything was there. Much nicer then Ocean City's beach area. We had to stop at the boardwalk for "Peppers" which serves TONS of different flavors of ice cream. My favorite "Cake Batter" Ice Cream. They actually put cake batter into the mix, and tastes just like you were licking the bowl of a butter cake before cooking it.

Again, at the outlets my mom paid for most of the clothes and things we got. Although being the way that I am I tried to separate myself from her so that I could buy a few things on my own without her having to pay for them and me feel guilty.

The only other highlight of my day was sitting in the car waiting for them as they shopped at some sea shell place, I got to talk to a boy on the phone. Now I'm not going into great detail on this person yet I will say that I have some interest in him and just hope maybe we can learn more about each other and take things from there.

Sunday we spent a part of it at the beach and then some more shopping. I'll tell you one thing, I'm shopped out! (Can it be true?!)

The only thing out of the norm for Sunday was that a girl saw me naked. I was in the dressing room at a Sports Zone store having a smile from ear to ear with the deals I was getting there (this time I was paying for the clothes). Well, I guess the lock didn't work in the dressing room I was in. And the door swings open with a girl walking right in. I jump up a mile and then smile and start laughing. She is like "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" and walks right out. I could hear her tell her friend outside the dressing room that I must be some kind of pervert to leave the door unlocked for anyone to walk in. When I was done I walked by letting her know I wasn't a pervert and that the lock on the door just doesn't work. This was about as exciting as it gets. And probably not all that exciting because some of you have already seen me naked.

Back - sorta

I'm back, sorta.

Sorta meaning - I'm back home now from the beach but so busy at work and home that I might not be able to post much today.

I want to take this post to THANK Bingo for filling in for me. He did a great job and I owe him some more porn. While our styles are completely different in writing, he can be just as entertaining as me. Who would have thought!? (You know I'm messing with you Bingo). THANK YOU BINGO! *kiss*

I will say I had a wonderful time on the trip and I'll write a post about it soon (some of it is gonna be pretty entertaining). Saturday was the only day we got a lot rain there. So for those wondering about the storm it really wasn't all that bad.

Ok, glad to be back and I'll try getting back into the groove soon (including all the missed blog I need to catch up on as well).

In Which I Receive Birthday Porn

Also, I have been remiss in sending a very special thanks to Billy the birthday gift he sent me. Yes, my birthday was a little bit ago (no, I was not spanked 22 times) and he got the gift which keeps on giving—porn!

So yes Billy, every time I put in that DVD I will think of you… but more importantly I will be thinking of sex!

Sunday, August 15, 2004

In Which I Don’t Offer A Signing Bonus

Even though I disagree with what they are saying I at least understand what people are talking about when they make statements about being against gay marriage or that they feel homosexuality is immoral.

What I cannot seem to understand is when people accuse homosexuals of “recruiting.” I mean its not like those statements where I just disagree with them—I just have no idea. I mean I understand each word but it’s just when you put them together that all meaning seems to be lost!

There are no homosexual scholarships to entice people.
There is no free shiny new toaster you receive when you signup.
You don’t even get a free key chain!

I can’t even argue against this position because like I said before… I just have no idea what it means.

Saturday, August 14, 2004

In Which I Talk About Preteen Boys

Spent the afternoon today reading all about young boys experimenting with playing with there wands… yes Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix! A truly classic piece of literature! I had borrowed a friend’s copy back during finals but just finally started it this week and finished it today.

Ya know those books are not exactly good or anything but yet they are strangely addictive… and I don’t care who disagrees with me but I swear that there is a growing since of sexual tension in these books as the kids get into what we shall here refer to as “puberty age.” I think we are going to be seeing a love triangle develop… which will make there status as Children’s Books questionable but which will certainly make the movies more interesting to watch.

Friday, August 13, 2004

In Which I Pose A Question

Who is hotter, old Brawny man (on the right) or new Brawny man (on the left)?
Ok, now which one looks more like a porn star?


In Which I Embrace Unemployment

My first reaction anytime a friend asks me to do something is of course to try and do as bad of a job as I possibly can. I know, not exactly what most of you would think of but if you really mess up when someone asks you for some help the next time they are thinking about someone to ask for something they will skip over your name since they believe you to be completely incapable—that way you won’t ever be asked to help by that friend ever again… and if your real lucky word will spread and before long nobody will be asking you for help with anything.

No, no don’t worry I am not going to use that tactic here and give graphic details of how a hysterectomy is performed or anything—Billy deserves better than that! It is somewhat of a tricky thing though to “guest blog” for someone since blogs are such a personal thing and you can’t really fill that person’s shoes but if I play my cards right by the time Billy does come back you will boo him offstage and demand Bingo!

A little background for those of you who don’t know me… I am a twenty-something, southern guy, fresh out of college and unemployed (possibly unemployable) with a degree in Political Science. Being unemployed during the summer though is not the worst thing in the world since playing volleyball and swimming cost very little—actually it is very much like having a summer vacation from school except that instead of returning to school at the end of it I go straight into an early Christmas break.

Ok, well I am out to enjoy the fun and sun for another day.

Until next time,

Thursday, August 12, 2004

In Which I Guest Blog

Bingo here, I will be filling the void left here while Billy boy is on vacation—just testing the waters right now to make sure everything works… the real fun starts tomorrow!

If Madonna calls, I'm not here

Hey gang! *hugs all around*

I just wanted to let you know that I'm going away for a few days. I should be back Monday night hopefully.

It's a much needed vacation (since I haven't had one yet this year). It'll be short, but sweet. It's a trip to the beach. The weather is calling for rain all weekend, but I don't care that much right now since time off is time off. I'm going to enjoy it no matter what ;)

I originally thought maybe I would get a guest blogger to fill in for me while I'm gone. But of course being me, I waited till the last minute to make such plans and I'm guessing it'll probably go silent while I'm away. Don't forget about me! And promise you'll return ok? :)

Until I return - Be good boys and girls :-P
Oh, and check out all the really cool blogs I have linked since you now have that extra time to do that ;)

So let me tell you just a little..*WARNING GRAPHIC POST*


I know some of you have probably been reading my blog for a little while now. Others are newer and probably don't have enough time to go back and read all my previous posts.

While I think I can be pretty entertaining and strange sometimes in these posts, there are huge things that you guys don't know about me. Some make me who I am today, others are probably not all that important to you.

I've been thinking since I'm single now, "where did I go wrong in it all?" Maybe I shouldn't have tried the whole gay thing after all (ok, I'm kidding you guys). But that brings up *a story of a lovely fellow, who was married and a Navy Seal by day* (sings to the Brady Bunch Theme).

My first gay experience -

This was in college back when I worked as a Librarian (A Periodical Clerk) and we had just received a bunch of new computers to access AOL to their online periodicals (and used AOL back then to get to the Washington Post Online, etc). Now before this transition to AOL, all our online information was done on BBS's running on modems that did 300 baud. When the college kicked it up a notch and went to 14,400 kbps baud modems and AOL's new graphically interface, we were all impressed (didn't take much back then).

This was also the same time when the web was really starting to take off. It was before IE existed, and Opera I believe was our first graphical web browser we used (at least at the college). AOL didn't even have the web intergrated at this point. Ok, enough boring you with that... basically this was all new shit. And I was online all the time because of the work that I did. One night I was bored and found the chat rooms. Looking for people local to chat with I really didn't find that much available. The one room I did stumble upon was "DC's M4M". Being new to chatting I had no clue what M4M meant. All I saw was DC and I knew there would be other people close to me to chat with.

I got in the room and .. WOW!, what nice guys these all were (not really paying much attention that there weren't any girls in the room).

To make a long story shorter, I ended up talking a fair amount to a few guys that night. One of them had asked if I wanted to go out "clubbing" with him. He would "show me around the city giving me the tour of all the hot spots". And boy did he do that, but that is later in this story.

So I agree still not knowing about the whole M4M thing. We meet up at a mutual location, and he decides to drive (which is fine by me since I HATE driving in the city). The first place we go to is a club. A gay strip club to be exact. And while you might think I was really appalled at this being the straight guy, I actually had been very curious about guys for awhile.

I had dating and slept with a few girls and didn't mind it at all. BUT, something was missing. And I found myself getting just as aroused at seeing and thinking about guys sometimes.

So we get in the club, and I'm just speechless basically. Not happy or mad, just don't know what to say. He hands me bout 30 dollars (in ones) and tells me to start handing them to the strippers. I do, and the strippers just start waving their dicks in my face. This was at a time in Wash DC where things weren't so strict at these clubs. They would dick slap you in the face.. allow you to touch and stroke them... and even put it in your mouth if you felt you were dangerous enough to handle the risks that takes. Strippers were even fucking each other on the bar.

So with feeling the strippers huge cocks in my hands and them looking so hot, I'm instantly turned on. I was harder then a rock. And "Navy Seal" guy was too by this. I think it was the combo of me being new to it all, being a virgin to guys, and also me being young fresh meat ready to shoot a load.
"Navy Seal" was hot to, built like a fuckin brick house and had eyes that you could get lost in.

We end up leaving the club and he shows me a few other bars around town. I'm all horned up from the night and he can tell. He asks me if he can fuck me. Me being the curious person I am, say "Sure why not!" I'm curious enough to see what that is like.

So we make a pit stop to the sex store to by lube, condoms, and he insists me being the first time that I should try a "popper". I had no clue what that meant, but I said "ok".

We end up fucking 3 times that night. And the places we did it at would make your head spin. I'm not proud really of where we did it at, but I also didn't know the city well enough to know any better either.

To give you an example.. he was driving and said we gotta make a trip to this park. We eventually pull up to a parking lot and he asks me to follow him. We hop a fence and I see lots of grass and trees where we are at. He pushes me down to the ground and strips me. Right away he is lubing up with the items he had in his hand and telling me to sniff the popper. The next thing you know I'm screaming in pain and pleasure.

After cumming in his condom in me twice that time he gets up and asks if I know where we are. I tell him I don't know and then he grabs me by the hand and walks me around the trees where we are at. I see tons of crosses, and immediately know then I just had sex in the National Cemetery.

There is a lot more stories (and this one still has a ton more to it) but this is getting long so I'll end it for another day that maybe you guys want to hear more. But I will say this, once I had this sexual experience, I knew for certain who I really was!

Wednesday, August 11, 2004

From my friend Chris

This is from Chris's blog. I can't believe this is an actual ad for someone running for Congress. I could almost swear this was to out of it to be real, but it is real!

Here is the ad.

Weird Thoughts

Have you ever wondered weird thoughts like this:

*Staying at a hotel you think - "I wonder how many people are having sex right now in this hotel"*

*Driving down the road you think - "I wonder how many guys cocks are bigger then 9 inches that I've passed this morning"*

*Trying on clothes at the mall you think - "I wonder if anyone sexy has tried on this before me"*

*Going to the bathroom you think - "I wonder how that big of a shit came out of my ass when a dick that size would hurt me there"*

*Soaping up your body you think - "I wonder if soap is safe to use as a lube"*

*Dancing naked in the living room you think - "I wonder if Josh Hartnett (or someone else) would find this sexy"*

And the weirdest thought of all right now.. what the hell is this lady doing with this cat?

CLICK ON THE PIC to see more pictures of this cat (it's so cute and ugly!)

Tribe network

Guess I was that one extra person that it couldn't handle. Seems like the Tribe network is down right now.

"System Outage is undergoing maintenance right now. We apologize for the inconvenience and will have you back online shortly.
Thanks for your patience."

And I was just starting to enjoy myself! You should take a look at it once it comes back online (in case you haven't already). It is a way to meet/chat with other bloggers and people who have similiar interests as you.

Tuesday, August 10, 2004

"Tits pervert - Fitz Herbert"

You know, reading this blog is kind of like watching "Bridget Jones's Diary" ;)

It's entertaining, funny, treasured, classic... has it's good and sad moments... ok, maybe the movie isn't as good ;)
Anyways I'm kinda wondering how many gay guys out there have a thing for boobs? And I'm wondering why. I've stumbled upon a pretty big following of boob lovers out there and while I can see beauty in them, I don't understand the fascination some people have taking it from a level of admire to a lust almost. Some even have to touch the boulders! Look out Otto Titsling!

So fuss up all you titty perverts out there! All you Fitz Herberts.. is there something you can tell me to change my mind and make me love the boobs?

Monday, August 09, 2004

Songs of the moment

Sunday, August 08, 2004

It's about time...

we get some for our viewing pleasure ;)

I often wondered if someone would come out with a tape like this. And I guess finually someone has.

Billy fought the battle of the Kevin-o

Life has a weird way of doing things.

I got a voice mail from my ex Kevin (the person I was with for 7 years) with those famous words "We gotta talk". I wasn't really sure what this meant because we weren't together anymore. Kevin and I stopped seeing each other back around November. In Feb. I met another guy that I started dating for a few months, but that officially ended back in May.

After that ended Kevin and I began to talk about maybe trying to work things out and see if we could do it again. So we went out on a few dates (not many) and talked on the phone sometimes. Nothing seemed to get to serious, but that was partly because believe it or not, I was heart broken by the guy I had started seeing back in Feb. and thought I just needed a break to make sure he was no longer going to be in the back of my mind as a "maybe". It wouldn't be fair to Kevin if I still had feelings for the other guy.

So I did end up getting over the other guy and about 3 weeks ago things were starting to look ok between Kevin and I. About a week or so later I get a phone call from Kevin saying that I'm the right person at the wrong time, and he needs to focus on his work (something big is happening with his job). Ok, I wasn't really all that hurt by THIS because while I love Kevin, I'm not in love with him anymore.

I pretty much break contact with Kevin for a few days. I then get a phone call from Kevin inviting me over to his place for dinner. Reluctant, I accept. We have a nice dinner and watch a movie, and he starts up with the I loves you's and miss you... lets work on things.. This coming from the same guy that was telling me the time wasn't right. MEN ARE SO CONFUSING!

I pretty much say I don't want to be in a relationship where I am questioned like that. I hate this on again off again shit. If someone loves me "SHOW ME".

But you know during all of this, I have a gut feeling. A really strong one. If someone loves me, what is so hard about juggling his work schedule with seeing me? I'm not asking to be attached at the hip in order to be happy with the person. Just every once in a while some nice cuddling is all I require. I felt like something more was going on here that he didn't tell me.

And so, back to that voice mail I get from Kevin. I call him back asking "what's up".

"I've met someone else who I have fallen in love with", I KNEW IT! There had to be something else going on. And as it turns out, the whole questioning thing was the same time that he was starting to fall for this guy and so he lied to me by saying it was just the job only, AND by withholding information. Now on a side note he says he didn't lie to me, he just kept information from me... wouldn't you call this a lie? But you know I'm sure he wants to not call it that so it doesn't make himself look bad in his mind, whatever.

Anyways, it has now set in my mind that 2 people I have cared for (Kevin and the other ex which I'm sure I'll talk about him another day), are off the 'lets see if we can work things out' list if they ever approach me again with that.

Men are pigs!

While I am pissed that he 'withheld' information, I'm not saddened luckily because for 1) I had that gut feeling something was up 2) I didn't have feelings resurface with him which could have happened if things continued 3) because besides all of this, he even has balls to tell me about his new boys dick. Which I never asked about from the start. I'm pretty sure that is why he is with this guy, if he is so excited to tell me about it. Either that or to try to make me jealous.

Ok, can you tell I'm a little bitter?

All I'm asking for is honesty out of a person (and withholding info is a part of that). What's even funnier is that as my luck has it, this boy actually called Kevin up while we were out on a date together, and they talked on the phone during our date. That seemed to be a regular thing with my other ex as well (if that hints at what happened with that relationship).

But with all of this going on, I'm still having a great weekend :)

Saturday, August 07, 2004

Out - just out

Went out last night to a club called Apex in DC. Had an alright time. My friend Aaron wanted to go, and we met up with my other friend Bill and his BF.

They all wanted me to dance, but for some reason I just have 2 left feet and didn't. If you remember Elaine's dancing on Seinfeld then thats pretty much like me I believe. So I just kinda stood back and people watched. Bill isn't much of a dancer which helped out some with me not getting bored. I got my fair amount of stares which was cool, and a few guys tried to hit on me. But I believe meeting someone at a bar isn't the ideal place to meet someone. Maybe I'm just being picky. But I'm also content where I'm at, at this moment.

But I did bump into some friends from my old IRC days there. It was nice seeing them again. They really haven't changed all that much. And I love them all because they didn't come close to guessing my age :)

I'll write more later.

Friday, August 06, 2004

Death by no power

My main computer died last night. I was saddened and pissed the fuck off! I get home and notice the CPU wasn't turned on. I left it on before I went into work. I thought maybe the power went out longer then what the UPS backup system can handle. So I hit the switch, nothing happens. I check the plug and all and decide to reset the power supply. The computer turns on. Cool! I get ready to go out with Chris for dinner.

When I was leaving it was still on and working, so I thought everything was cool.

I get back later and noticed it was turned off again. This time nothing was getting the CPU to come on at all. Thinking it was a power supply I get out my old computer that doesn't work (but has a good power supply in it) and switch them off.

The computer starts right up, and everything looks fine until the hard drives start spinning to load up Windows. Then I hear the hard drives clicking on and off and the fans struggling to stay spinning. I knew I was pushing it though. This power supply was only for 350 Watts. And my computer was drawing more then the thing could give it. So I shut it off.

Now after work I have to go shopping for a new one and hope this is the main problem to it getting fixed. They are not cheap either. Here I was actually hoping to go out tonight with my friend Aaron and have a little fun, but instead it looks like that fun money is going towards my new power supply. BLAH!

Thursday, August 05, 2004

*BURP* Coworkers *BURP*

Well, back in the day when the company I work for wasn't so cheap I had a nice big office. I was kind of sealed off from the world outside in cubes. In a way, it was nice. I could eat and sleep in my office, and maybe do other things in it as well ;)

But I always felt like I was separate from everyone else. I saw most of those people act more like a family together because they would talk and create a bond with their coworkers across from their cubicle.

Well, today I sit in one of those cubes. And next to mine I have a really loud lady from NYC. For business reasons we'll call her "Newyorker". Newyorker and I do get along. Most of the time we see eye to eye on things and we hold nice conversations. The only thing is, some bad qualities come out of her that grate at me sometimes.

She's loud, and that can get to me when she's on the phone with someone. "Michael's hemorrhoids are flaring up again Marianne, when we go places he has to take his donut".. Ok, I don't need to know this! First, this isn't the donut I want to be floating through my mind. Second, picturing someone with the hems isn't cool, especially since Michael's picture is on the desk and I have an active imagination. "When we went to see Spiderman 2 he had to visit the toilet 3 freakn times Mary".... "I got sick of telling him what he missed" .. SHUT UP!!!

And she's got this thing about burping and farting. I must be like this little princess to her. I hardly ever fart or burp in public unless I'm among friends that can handle that. If I have to at work I'll make a trip to the bathroom. If it's gonna be a loud fart I muffle it with toilet tissue while in the stall. Yeah, weird isn't it?

But Newyorker well be talking at me facing my direction "Billy, per diem for San Diego is? *BURP* Oh wow, that was a big one!" Then 2 more come out.... "Damn I'm on a roll!" and sometimes a fart well come out, "That sounded juicy!"

Her poor kids.

"Think I left a stain with that one!"

Seems like I'm not the only one with annoying 'neighbors'.

Wednesday, August 04, 2004

Looks like a shaft!

Amazing race was full of great quotes last night... "Looks like a shaft!" was my personal favorite. Course my mind went dirty on that one. I wish they showed a shaft...

"It's gonna get dark soon!" - What is up with Mirna (from team Tinsy)? She was worried several times about it getting dark. Who the fuck cares. The sun goes down and it's party time in my book ;) "I'm scared!" - also said by Mirna many times during this race. She is making Charla do all the road blocks! What a wimp! I not liking Mirna at all. I want Charla to tell Mirna to "shove it" just once. I guess I shouldn't complain, there was no "Charla help me!" in this episode (loved it when they showed Charla's eyes roll back into her head then saying "Let me do it!" during the meat handling road block).

What is up with the teams this season? They really don't have any motivation for the million. I mean, did you see the short bus crowd all laying around not researching if there was an earlier flight out (except team Tinsy)? That is not smart at all. I think the only 2 teams trying to play it a little smart are the Tinsy's and Colin & Christie (who use the travel agencies and talk to people well in advance). Team Cha Cha Cha did this extremely well a few seasons back. I first thought that Colin & Christie did one stupid thing, use a "fast forward". They were already way ahead of the pack. Now they think they'll be even further ahead because of using it. Don't they watch the show?! Almost every other episode the whole pack of people are all brought back together again due to maybe something being closed or whatever. BUT then I remembered there are only 2 fast forwards this season. And they just used one of them up, making it harder for someone else to catch up or pass them in this part of the game. I bet maybe the next fast forward used will also be by someone who is in the lead. It's ashame the rules have changed on this. I preferred the old way more.

Anyways, I'll write more a little later today. Gotta focus on work for a few.

Quick thing that popped in my mind - why is it so funny when someone falls? On the show people seem to fall because they are in a rush. I remember when they had a detour "Hurl or Ass" on season 3 where teams had to ride a Donkey pulling a cart 7 miles. Heather who was on the cart had the harness break sending her face foward into the ground. I laughed so hard. It seems evil to laugh at, but it's a priceless moment. Another priceless one was this season, where the fat guys (Team Hilter) saw Mirna and Charla's vehicle and yell "Bitch" out the window. Mirna was trying to figure out how the car works and raises her head up clueless, "Who was that?". Team Hilter was also known to say "useless foreigners" (another reason I call them Hitler). They don't realize that some of the people don't speak English where they are at, and immediately they are useless (send them to the camps!). That was wrong, forgive me?

I really don't care much for Team Cosby (the African American couple) and Team Stigmata (the Christians). I miss some of the old teams, they should bring them back for a special season.

Remember Reichen? How could you forget him? ;)


Sick yet funny

One of the funniest blogs I have ever read. The pictures are priceless! If you are not into bathroom humor though, you may want to skip it.

Tuesday, August 03, 2004

And why we don't need people...

I was walking towards my car when I witnessed someone else trying to get out of her car. Psycho Mary (lets call her that) had barely cracked the door open when another car was pulling into the spot beside her where she was getting out to.

I believe the driver taking the parking spot didn't see "Psycho" trying to get out of her car because she had just started to. Like an inch of the door was open by the time the car was already pulling into the empty space.

Clueless Candy (lets call her that) driving the car into the spot gets out of her car and heads towards the grocery store. Mary steps out and starts screaming insults and cuse words at Candy... "You slut, you ignorant bitch, get the fuck back here..."

Candy just keeps on walking.

Psycho Mary pulls out her keys and "DAMN!" I said.. "Someone has issues!" .. as I see Mary scratching the hell out of Clueless Candy's new BMW. I then see Mary glare at me because she heard what I said. I was glad I was leaving rather then coming.

Let's just hope Mary doesn't stalk me and mess up my car!


"people who need people... are the luckiest people in the world"

Give me a fucking break!

Do we really need people? Ok, maybe we do. This is something that seems to almost be to tough to answer. Sometimes I think the healthiest way to look at life is if you are happy being by yourself. Isn't that what they say? "You gotta be able to live life on your own without needing anyone."

BUT, then again I don't know about this. What if we didn't have relationships, friends, and family like the way we do now? We would be a mess! A blob of stupid people running around this earth bumping into things. Total chaos! We need teachers, doctors, lawyers - yes those are people too ;) We need those lovers who rub our feet, who kiss our necks, and whisper sweet things in our ears, RIGHT? Oh, and especially those that cuddle ;)

We need those friends to hang out with, to tell our deepest thoughts to, and to be there for each other when we have problems.

So maybe we do need each other sometimes. Do you think we don't need anyone? Do you think we need a balance? Or we actually do need people in our lives all the time?

And what a random post this was!

Bingo was his name-o

Since Bingo and Morgan (updated) are doing it, I thought I would post another pic of me on this site as well. Wonder if anybody else will follow. I'm such a poser! ;)

(click picture to enlarge)
Not the best picture there is, but a very recent one of me

Monday, August 02, 2004

Some randoms of today

Course I'll get a laugh at this, but who knows about anybody else ;)

Cm3000: I'm so happy I know y9u
Cm3000: you
CuteYoBoy: why is that?
Cm3000: because you can suck a golf ball through a garden hose

BingoAndHisToy: your life is kinda like a porn flick you could say
CuteYoBoy: yes, I could say that it has been
BingoAndHisToy: involving slings?
CuteYoBoy: LMAO
CuteYoBoy: never tried those, YET ;)
BingoAndHisToy: well i am sure that there is a special someone out there who is putting one up for you right now
CuteYoBoy: I hope it's strong... I'm gonna make it swing
BingoAndHisToy: well lets hope he bought the regular one and not the Jr.
CuteYoBoy: HAHA!!
CuteYoBoy: For those "vertically challenged" people
BingoAndHisToy: and kids
CuteYoBoy: ewe!
BingoAndHisToy: of all ages
BingoAndHisToy: whatever your so closed minded ;-)

If I just breath

It seems that my life as gotten a little busier the past few days. While I did enjoy some hours on Sunday to just breath, most of my weekend was taken up by a birthday party and work that I brought home.

I'm kinda curious (on another note) about my ex Dre and my best friend Maria getting together to make an Amazing Race video to try to be contestants on the show. I think if they can get to do it, it'll be EXTREMELY entertaining for all. Not only is Dre cute and single now (which he'll get a following just for that), but he's also very outspoken and can give someone a "fuck you" whenever they need it ;) He's gay, so sorry girls he doesn't like the tit.

And for Maria, she's a lesbian who can act like a 2 year old and still dress to impress (rare sometimes I know for them) *kidding to all the lesbians out there, I need someone to work on my car* But she has a mouth on her as well... knows many different languages ... I would hate to cross their paths on the show. It could get evil with the both of them (guys I mean it in the best way though!)

So anyways they have to do a video to enter. I heard rumors about them cross dressing. I told Maria that she needs to buy like a ton of ground meat and carry it down the streets of DC on her shoulders (kinda mimicking what they did a few shows back) while dressed up as a drag king. Dre being the girl can fuss about his nails and how they would break if he even tried to help out. Of course he needs those 4 inch press on nails.

I'm sure there could be better ideas for a video out there. I think it would be great to see a lesbian and a gay guy together as a team on the show. Bring a new twist into the game. They can act straight when they need to, but also critique everything in site in that gay way that only we can do. Hey, maybe that should be a part of the video, you know, going around town trying to win the race but then you get lost because someone is looking at all the cute guys going by, while the other is looking and admiring all the cars that go by. And if you guys use any of these ideas in the video, I want HALF of the winnings! ;)

I wish them both luck though. I'm sure getting on that show almost takes a miracle. So I hope someone is looking out for them, because I know that would be like a dream come true for them both.

Oh, and Dre thanks for Castle Grayskull . As a kid growing up I wanted this toy more then anything else. I think my parents thought it was a bit to violent (You know how Heman used his sword on all those bad guys .... hmmmm sounds kinda kinky!) . No wonder I liked Heman so much ;) And he was built like a brick house! But today I met up with Dre so he could give me my birthday gift (one of them) which was that. I can't wait to get home and play! Told you I was a kid.